David Pryde began referring to himself in the third person in 1997, the year he first stepped on a stage in Halifax to attempt stand-up comedy. Enjoying the experience tremendously, he decided to forsake his new journalism degree and trade freelance reporting for freer-lance stand-up. Returning to his hometown of Montreal, David’s incessant writing and performing paid off when he won the Just for Laughs Comedy Night in Canada Competition in 1999, a feat that prompted ego-centric spasms of speaking in the first person that would last brief periods of, I don’t know, about three words at a time.

David has performed in the USA, the U.K., and Australia, and a whole lot of stuff in Canada, including three Just for Laughs Galas, his own special on CTV’s Comedy Now, and regular appearances on The Debaters in both its radio and television incarnations. In recent years he has appeared on The Tonight Show with Jay Leno where he told exactly one joke on the “Pass the Mic” segment. He also had one line with Paul Giamatti in the film Barney’s Version. Both these accomplishments are compiled on his highlight reel which currently clocks in at seven seconds. David has also appeared in some well-received Standard Life commercials, was a regular in the IFC sitcom, The Festival, played with the Montreal improv troupe, On the Spot, and still pops up in the occasional second-person tangent (but you don’t want to go into that, do you?).

He also pays some bills by writing comedy for others, with credits on CBC’s This Hour Has 22 Minutes, IFC’s The Business, and a couple of snappy headlines for The Onion (“Bully With Good Grades Indestructible” is the one he’ll mention at the slightest provocation). He’s even had a television show optioned that he would describe in the third person passive subjunctive (if he were allowed).

By far his most rewarding role is as a family man, if by reward you mean the complete opposite of acquired money. He has a wonderful Australian girlfriend who teaches English (go figure) and who gives him love, comfort and illegitimate offspring. The latter include a son who will tell you his father “goes to Cheeky Land” for a living, and a baby girl who since this writing will have no doubt developed vast new amounts of teeth, vocabulary, and methods of emotional blackmail.

David Pryde is enjoying his life immensely and only counts among his pet peeves organized crime, organized religion, organized bowling, and organizers of comedy events who, rather than introduce him by announcing one or two credits plus his name, instead print out this bio and try to read it out loud verbatim, only to realize right about now that it’s damn weird and that they’ve already lost the older folks in the audience who don’t really like their comedy too self-indulgent or “meta”.

I understand completely. He really does.